Monday, July 19, 2010

Uniquely Hardwired

I got to thinking (which is always a scary thought I've been told many times by my closest friends) that maybe there's something wrong with me. Or maybe it's not wrong but maybe it's just me being unique? Anyway, what I'm getting at is that I was thinking about life today and what it is that fills this life that I live. What it is that I feel that I'm really good at. And the thing that kept entering my cerebrum is the thought that "I'm good at working. Yes, I'm really good at working!" I'm not a big fan of sitting still and often go crazy after about 5-10 minutes of doing just that. Yes I know this may seem very draining to many of you but it's exhilarating to me in many ways.

It seems that I am always working at something in my life. I'm working at work. I'm working "volunteering" on my "weekends" or days off. I'm working during the evenings when I've got a few spare hours away from work trying to get some kind of chore or task done. Now it's not that I don't ever take time to just relax and have fun. But it seems like this is more of a rare occasion than anything else. I'm always trying to accomplish something by working towards making a positive impact on the world around me.

Currently I'm working extra shifts since we're short staffed at work. I'm also working during a majority of my time away from work at trying to build a company and a website from the bottom up that will help guide people to achieving a healthier life both physically, mentally, and emotionally. And then on the side I'm working by taking an online course to get certified in plant based nutrition to further my expertise in building my company and website. I'll be working even more after that by continuing my education and taking another online course to get certified in anticoagulation therapy this fall.

Even though I take some time off it's never really a lot. In fact, I've actually cashed out PTO (paid time off) because I've accumulated more than I can bank. And when you can bank 300 hours that's a lot of time off! I can't possibly think of what I would do if I would take all that time off?!

If you think of it, that's really a lot of work! I'm sure you're feeling exhausted just reading about it or maybe you can relate. It's funny because when I meet other people for the first time and they inquire about what I like to do for fun I actually have to pause and think about this for awhile. I often perceive a lot of odd assessments going through their head when they see me hesitate. They're probably thinking "Who doesn't automatically know what they like to do for fun?!!!" And it's not that I don't like to have fun but rather that a lot of the "work" that I do at least away from my real work (job) IS having fun to me. In a way, I can't imagine my life any other way. If I could single handedly save the world with my efforts I would. But that would take a lot more work that I'm capable of doing.

It's a good thing I'm single and have the time to accomplish so much. Then again maybe that's why I'm single :-) And it's most certainly a big reason why the whole having children thing is out of the question for me now and forever. Not that having and raising a family is bad it's just not for me. I love the way I live my life and look forward to what I can accomplish in the next 60-70 years.

In the mean time, I guess I'll just keep working because the feeling I get from reflecting on the difference that it all makes really touches home to me. It leaves me with a smile inside that no human can see. And that's worth every last second that I've ever spent "working". So if you see me and I'm actually taking a break in life cherish it because it won't last for long! I can't help but think of what my uncle was always saying when it comes to life.... "You can rest when you're dead." Well I'm not dead yet :-)


Anonymous said...

you are so funny Dustin :)

Anonymous said...

I prefer the "I'll sleep when i'm dead" quote. Live how you want to live. If it makes you happy, and more importantly and less selfishly: if the life you live brings other people joy, then who's to say you should stop/change?

Just stick to being a good person and doing good deeds. Sometimes we can all go overboard with the things we do and things that gain our interest. It's just important to walk that line between practicing what you preach...and not preaching at all.

Good men lend their energy/light to others so that their times arent as dark and drain themselves in the process. There are many forms of self-sacrifice.

All of which are more noble then condemnation.

Anonymous said...

"It leaves me with a smile inside that no human can see." i can see it